Friday, May 8, 2009

Authentic Beauty....

Oh Gosh, I have gotten so far behind in my blogging! Let me see, what's been up? I had been working hard getting ready for Authentic Beauty, and had the amazing experience of speaking there this past weekend! Its been about a week, and I have to say, its not been an easy one!
I have not done a ton of speaking, but enough that I am getting the feel for what kind of speaking i do, and my "style" I guess you could say! Well, for whatever reason, God wanted to stretch me, and I felt like I was very much out of my comfort zone, and came out feeling more than any other time that I have spoken that I laid my heart bare! I am so blessed by those who have shared how God used that in their life, but I have to be honest, I have been the most insecure this past week than I have been since Jr High. It seemed the more I remembered the things I shared of my own heart, the more I wanted to crawl into a hole, or somehow take it back! Amazing isn't it, how Satan can sneak right in there, even after an amazing weekend watching God work, and trusting His guidance, its like I am Eve in the garden... "Did God really want you to share exactly what you shared? Or in your no good sinful flesh, did you screw this up big time!!!"....
I realize right here, in the middle of all the lies I need to stop, be silent, and hear my Savior's still small voice!! You are my princess, I love you, and even in your weakness...most of all in your weakness I am STRONG!!! "
So, Dear Abba, I lay my insecurities, my fears, my pride, and even those things I hope for all at the foot of the cross!! Not my own, but Your Will be done!!

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